Posts Tagged ‘ truth ’

Sued by My Parents For Exposing My Sexual Abuse

Sep 17th, 2014 | By | Category: All Posts, Christina's Blog

Multnomah Falls, Columbia River Gorge Several months ago, I settled a sixteen month long lawsuit with my parents (actually, my dad died before the case ended so only my mother was left). They sued me for defamation of character and intentional infliction of emotional distress. I’d publically exposed my childhood sexual abuse by my dad and they didn’t like that very much.

I like to think of myself as a crusader. The internal image of myself is a fierce-looking woman, charging on horseback toward oppressors, declaring the truth to those they hold bound and inspiring them to overthrow the tyrants’ rule. I don’t back down from standing for and with the oppressed.

I’ve eliminated abusers from my own life, but after the relief of not having a relationship with my mother for nearly six years, she was back in it. With the lawsuit, I didn’t have the choice of walking away. I not only had to read the painful lies my mother used as “discovery”, I had to respond with a defense. I felt controlled and victimized again.

Not knowing the outcome of the case, how long it would go on or how many thousands of dollars we’d have to invest in it, it was difficult to make plans or to be motivated to do much of anything. It felt like Evil held me as its captive.



Domestic Violence: Why Did I Stay?

Sep 30th, 2012 | By | Category: All Posts, Guest Blog

by Patty Hite Everything I did was for my husband.  Any ideas or suggestions on my part would end in Bill physically or emotionally abusing me.  I always felt my life depended on making a perfect meal.  When he didn’t like it, he would knock me out of my chair and force me to eat […]



It’s Not About You, Mom

Aug 26th, 2012 | By | Category: All Posts, Christina's Blog

by Christina Enevoldsen Yesterday was my 46th birthday. Birthdays prompt me to reflect on my life—where I’ve come from and where I am now. Some of those thoughts included the woman who gave birth to me. My mother walked out of my life a few years ago and adamantly denies that my father sexually abused […]



Why I Talk About My Childhood Abuse Over and Over

May 12th, 2012 | By | Category: All Posts, Christina's Blog

by Christina Enevoldsen When I used to talk about my childhood sexual abuse, I heard familiar accusations: “You just want attention” or “Nobody likes a crybaby.” As I poured out the same story again and again to my friends, I felt guilty for wasting their time. I believed that there was a rule that I […]



Peace and Protection From Abuse

Apr 2nd, 2012 | By | Category: All Posts, Christina's Blog

by Christina Enevoldsen The sun was falling behind the trees, the wind was gusting and the child desperately sought refuge, though not from the elements. The same man who had hurt her before in ways she couldn’t understand was getting closer. The girl spotted movement in one of the houses. A woman was inside, cheerful […]



Understanding My Abusive Parents Didn’t Heal Me

Dec 26th, 2011 | By | Category: All Posts, Christina's Blog

by Christina Enevoldsen After I watched the movie, “The Joy Luck Club”, I felt hollow and sad. The feelings haunted me for days. In the story, four daughters struggle against their emotionally abusive mothers until they discover their mothers’ difficult and tragic pasts. Through understanding, the daughters begin to appreciate their mothers’ trials and their […]



Domestic Violence: The Signs I Missed

Dec 11th, 2011 | By | Category: All Posts, Guest Blog

by Patty Hite The day we got married, Bill greeted me in our kitchen with a slap across the face that was so hard it knocked me to the floor. He grabbed my hair and dragged me into the bedroom where he raped me. Afterward, he told me that now I belonged to him and […]



Forgetting About Abuse: Who Does That Really Serve?

Oct 30th, 2011 | By | Category: All Posts, Christina's Blog

by Christina Enevoldsen “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to fulfill it.” George Santayana Recently, I warned a close family friend that his children weren’t safe around my dad, who molested me for most of my childhood. The friend was silent for a moment. He’s known about my abuse for years; he doesn’t […]



Dating After Sexual Abuse: Who Was I Attracting?

Sep 25th, 2011 | By | Category: All Posts, Guest Blog

by Bethany I grew up watching Disney movies, dreaming that one day I could be the heroine of the story or wed a handsome prince. I yearned to live out an epic romance, where I would be swept off my feet by a loving man. I wanted a guy to see me and think, “Wow! […]



The Truth About Blame

Sep 11th, 2011 | By | Category: All Posts, Christina's Blog

by Christina Enevoldsen Blame has a bad reputation. People say it’s useless and unproductive. It’s been accused of preventing people from moving forward. It’s been blamed for keeping people in victim mentality. I was one of those people who blamed blame. I spread rumors about blame, believing them to be true. I quoted things like: […]