"Her book explains confusing emotions in a clear and concise way that would normally take years of painful and slow therapeutic work to unravel. Her steps are like a brightly lit path out of darkness untangling confusing emotions while leading you quickly through to self discovery and healing."
"... savoring every bit of it as it reveals more and more of the feelings I've had for a long time...The questions at the end of the chapters help me to put into words the feelings I've never been able to share with anyone."
"This is an excellent book and workbook...Difficult concepts related to healing were clearly explained. The topics and questions are comprehensive and relevant...As someone who now works with others who have been abused I use this book to assist in their healing."
I used to feel heroic for sticking with abusive relationships. I believed that 'love conquers all', which to me meant that love gave me power. I thought I could make everything better through love. That worked well for my abusers; the worse they treated me, the better I treated them. 'Killing with kindness' is really victim mentality. My so-called love was really manipulation. Placating abusers never worked for me as a long-term solution. It perpetuated abusive patterns by validating them. That wasn’t love for myself or for my abusers. ”