Comments on: Rebuilding My Boundaries After Abuse

By: Kady

Kady — Mon, 27 Aug 2012 05:22:28 +0000

Thank you for your time responding to my post

By: Linda Pittman

Linda Pittman — Thu, 23 Aug 2012 21:10:53 +0000

Kady, being brave means that underneath you are afraid but you do it anyway. You do it because you want to live and you want a good life. I am glad you came to OSA as the tools and support here will help you to become free. It is never too late to begin that journey to freedom and it is so worth everything. I wish you the best and know that if you survived the life you lived in abuse, nothing is big enough to stop you now.

By: Kady

Kady — Thu, 23 Aug 2012 17:55:45 +0000

Ill be 50 next year and only 7 years ago was the first time another human my therapist validated that i was abused. Mine was so covert and many players i was the family dog that everyone kicked. Statistics say i should have been dead at young age or prison die to the effects of child abuse. My mother is a master manipulator and in eyes of others she plays the victim and had me convinced it was me. I ve been told i have had depression since childhood as well as ptsd the same amount of time. I only learned of boundries 4 years ago every relationship except one has been abusive. I always thought i was the worst vicrimized human on planet worse human to myself too. Prisons are filles with people like me society throws us away justice system seea us as garbage we need to be head in ways that makea change and healing available whole lives are destroyed suicide etc because no one but those of us who lived it have found people like you brave enough to have found a way to break out of our internal hells and prisons. I still wonder if i will ever be free inside. So glad to meet all of you .

By: Linda Pittman

Linda Pittman — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 22:50:30 +0000

Tammy, I am glad that you were able to identify with the words I speak. Too often, we feel that there is no one out there that understands how we feel because we felt so isolated in our abuse. Keep on working on your healing, there are many here to share with and gain hope and healing wisdom and tips from. Together we have strength and hope and the world is full of the future for us…a good future.

By: Linda Pittman

Linda Pittman — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 22:46:54 +0000

Robbie, I am glad you have found a place of contentment and being a voice and advocate for others is such a satisfying thing when you can be the adult figure for others that was not there for you. I do recommend that getting books on boundaries will help you to recognize and develop safe and healthy ones. I am glad you have found OSA also. There are so many people that will help and support you here and the healing goes on!! Hugs back to you too!

By: Tammy

Tammy — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 12:55:17 +0000

Linda, thank you for giving me the words to describe my feelings and thoughts about my own situation. I did what I had to do, but often struggled in expressing it to someone else.

By: Robbie

Robbie — Sun, 22 Jan 2012 11:54:27 +0000

Wow, I am 56, and still recovering the ability to set healthy boundaries, some times when I try to explain that I never felt I had the power over my own body, normal people do not really understand.
I was so similiar, I felt that my body was something I just owed to men, I couldn’t say no. Even when I wanted to.
I sobered up many years ago, and even sober, I felt so helpless to protect myself.
I do say no now. And I do have healthier boundaries. I basically had to stop dating as I have found that I am seldom attracted to the kind of man who I could have a relationship with. But I am pretty happy without a man in my life.
I was verbally, physically and sexually abused by varios family members and it has been a long journey to recovery. But now I am involved in rescuing children from networks of sexual predators in Costa Rica, where I live. I have rescued several myself and am now working with a group to form a refuge for 11 to 17 year old girls who have been forced into prostitution. It has gone a long way towards helaing me. There is nothing as powerful as being that adult I wished had been there for me, Getting kids into safe hands and safe places, saving them from the living hell they are in, has healed so many scars and made me feel powerful and that my experience was a boot camp to save others from similiar experiences to mine. Thanks, the story touched me and I hope to some day have great boundaries! A giant hug to all!

By: susan

susan — Sat, 31 Dec 2011 23:37:30 +0000

Linda,

Thanks for the encouragement! It means so much to me right now.

By: Linda Pittman

Linda Pittman — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 17:30:16 +0000

Susan, I am glad you found OSA too! I am glad that you are breaking the abuse legacy in your family. The ones who acuse us of ruining their life are part of that abuse legacy. They want to keep the secrecy and are in denial, still. I am so glad you have done this not only for yourself but also for your daughter. This will change her life because you are validating her and she deserves this as much as you. Keep working on uncovering the lies and toxic stuff that keeps you from enjoying healing! It is never easy standing up for what is right when the people in your life want to stay in denial but it is really worth having a life that is full of peace, joy and truth!

By: susan

susan — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 15:40:17 +0000

I am so glad to find this website! I married a pedophile after being sexually abused by my father and other relatives so now I am dealing with the effects. My 19 year old son sexually abused his 12 year old sister and I reported the crime and he is going to court soon and may serve 8 to 30 years in prison. Some members of the family are angry and feel that I shouldn’t have reported it since he is charged with a felony and will be on a sex offender registry. They say I have ruined his life. It is so encouraging to read these posts and be validated for protecting my daughter.