Comments on: Me and My Shadow

By: Christina Enevoldsen

Christina Enevoldsen — Fri, 07 Sep 2012 18:57:27 +0000

Rachel,
That’s such a great way to put it. I agree that those coping methods need to be honored since they helped us survive and that as we heal, we can let them go. Thanks for sharing that insight and welcome to OSA!
Christina

By: Rachel

Rachel — Fri, 07 Sep 2012 18:03:41 +0000

My therapist calls this side of me the Fighter. She’s quick to anger. Quick to protect by throwing up the wall, distancing me from feeling, from hurting. I hate when she tries to protect me in a situation, I know logically, I don’t need protection from. But, I’m told that without her, I wouldn’t be where I am today. She kept me sane, kept me moving forward. And I should be thankful to her. I should respect her role and allow her the rest she deserves. I need to convince her that she did a good job, but I can handle it from here.

By: Cara

Cara — Thu, 08 Dec 2011 19:08:24 +0000

Very well said!!

By: Corinne Cori Cramer

Corinne Cori Cramer — Sat, 03 Jul 2010 02:04:12 +0000

thank you.

By: Linda Deaton

Linda Deaton — Sat, 03 Jul 2010 02:03:52 +0000

Very good advice from a grandma…I agree!!

By: Stacey Banks

Stacey Banks — Sat, 03 Jul 2010 02:03:29 +0000

Love it!

By: Christine Ruck

Christine Ruck — Sat, 03 Jul 2010 02:03:11 +0000

Learn from your friend the shadow. Setting boundaries to keep you safe…. it’s a very good and necessary thing. Making sure you feel safe in her company until you are able to project the self confidence that keeps the predators at bay, not a bad thing.
If someone thinks your friend is being ‘bitchy’, it would not be out of line to remind them … See Morethat their actions are triggering a defensive response. Accept and allow apologies to be made if your shadow goes beyond what someone else may deem appropriate.
I have told grandchildren that if they where ever made to feel ‘creeped out’ by anyone’s actions or words that they had my full permission to be rude, loud or obnoxious (whatever it takes) to make the problem stop. If anyone expected an explanation or apology for their actions….they’d need to talk to grandma. I’d be happy to address the offended person’s issues with a child who has learned to be safe, even if intimidated.
Your shadow may be a shield that gets used from time to time, it’s just a tool. Those who want you to be safe have no problem with your invisible friend. Your fiend and I seem to have a lot in common, getting called a name or two is no big deal.